Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Pat Pelzel grows afro

Pat Pelzel grows afro: "Pat Pelzel grows afro!"

Don Sample Wins Mr Dull Guy Award

Don Sample Wins Mr Dull Guy Award: "Don Sample Wins Mr. Dull Guy Award!

Ruch, OR UPI
Don Sample, longtime broadcaster and bass virtuoso from the famous Applesauce Gang, has again won the 'Mr. Dull Guy' Award. This is the 7th consecutive year that Mr. Sample has won the award.
When told of his award, Sample grunted and admitted that he probably deserved it. Known for his lack of a sense of humor, Sample is responsible for giving the residents of the Rogue Valley a good days sleep. He has been known to lull listeners into such a deep sleep that many people have actually missed a day at work or at school.
'I am quite proud of my record in this regard', droned Mr. Sample. I feel I have contributed to the well-being of the citizens of this area by providing them with restful and sleep-inducing material. Other broadcasters do a disservice to folks by constantly giving them something interesting to think about, while I, on the other hand, lull them into a state of sleepiness almost akin to a trance.'
Mr. Sample credits his outstanding dullness to his long-time involvement with the infamous Applesauce Gang, with whom he traveled for many years.

'Those guys in the Applesauce Gang were so ridiculously cheerful, that I felt I had to do something to counteract it. So gradually I adopted a posture of studied dullness, punctuated with a severe lack of humor, just to give balance to the group.'
As winner of the Mr. Dull Guy Award, Sample was awarded a copy of the collectors item 'The Applesauce Gang Rides Again!'


Don Sample Wins Mr. Dull Guy Award!

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Pat Pelzel grows afro

Pat Pelzel grows afro: "Pat Pelzel grows afro!

Medford, Oregon April 1, 2005 --
The little town of Medford is abuzz today with the news that Pat Pelzel grows afro! After years of cultivating the bald image, Pat apparently did a 180 turn and pulled out all the stops in his effort to achieve notoriety on the web.
Pat, the mild-mannered digital guy at Pukey Print in Medford, also sometimes known at 'Hey Pat', has also been described as 'the Clark Kent of Medford' because of his penchant for changing clothes rapidly in the phone booth adjacent to his workplace.
'Hey -- I just like to wear different clothes during different parts of the day,' Pelzel explained while questioned by Medford police. 'You know -- in the morning I like to dress casually -- usually in my sweats. But after lunch, I like to put on the dog by switching to my tux, so I can impress clients who come in to Pukey Print in the afternoon when they are sleepy. And after work, I often don my sleeveless evening gown before I hit the town. And now I have decided I want hair after all these years, so I put my mind to it and presto! -- there it was this morning -- a beautiful black afro!'
Arnold Fishmaster, proprietor of Pukey Print and a close confidant of Pelzel, immediately started the presses rolling with the news that 'Pat Pelzel grows afro!' as soon as he heard the news about the new hairdo.
'Astounding!' remarked Arnold, who himself had sported an afro in years gone by. 'I can't believe that he grew it that fast! I just saw him last evening and he was bald, and yet this morning he had a full head of curley black hair. Obviously, he has a real winner on his hands, and I have no doubt that he will parley this remarkable talent into a world wide web business!'
'Yes', added Pelzel. 'I "

Diet & weight loss

Diet & weight loss: "

Weight Loss Diets:
Let Me Count the Weighs
Let�s face it. We live in a society that is obsessed with being thin and yet most of us are in serious need of weight loss. It�s not that we�re not trying. We�ve tried the weight loss pills and the weight loss fasts. We�ve tried the weight loss patch and the latest fad diet. We�ve gone to the book store to find a weight loss book and walked away empty handed, not because of the lack of books but because there were so many titles that our heads were swimming before we got half way through the section � and the worse part is that so many of them say that everyone else is wrong!
Weight loss is possible. It really is. I recently lost sixty pounds so I know it�s possible. So what are the answers to weight loss? Is it gastric bypass surgery � often called weight loss surgery? Are supplements the key to weight loss? What about weight loss drugs?
Experts in the medical community tell us that, your weight is determined by the difference between the amount of energy you take in and the amount you use. That is to say that, if you burn more calories than you eat� weight loss. So the experts tell us that we need to get more active if we want to achieve weight loss. Turn the television off and go for a walk with your spouse. Get active. Live life on your feet instead of your backside.
Second, they say that we need to view weight loss as a lifestyle change and after activity the next issue in lifestyle is what you eat. You need to find a dietary plan that is healthy and something that you can stick with. Can you eat grapefruit everyday for the rest of your life as so many of the grapefruit diets seem to advocate? Can you drink carrot juice day in a day out? That�s one of the complaints that I have run across most often about many weight loss diets. Can you eat nothin"

Internet Marketing web sites

Internet Marketing web sites: "
Here are the very best sources for creating your own internet marketing web site:
The easiest and fastest method for building a web site: XSitePro!
The very best instruction in how to sell other people's stuff: James Martell


Internet Marketing Without a Big-Picture Strategy Dances in Circles

04/27/05
by: Michael Pedone
Stop Tracking the Illusive 'Magic Bullet'
It seems like everyone is beating the drum for one Internet marketing method or another. And in the process they create plenty of hype and conflicting messages.
Website owners are left to wonder whom to believe when it comes to impressing the search engines. Which approach can deliver the 'magic bullet' they've been promised? Is it time to jump to the next 'sure thing,' that will entice both search spiders and web surfers?
The primary methods promoted to attract search engines and Web traffic aren't new:
Links and reciprocal links
Pay-per-click (PPC)
Search engine optimization (SEO) in all its variations
Blogs and forums
Writing and posting articles or press releases
Paid placement with ads and banners
But each of them shares a common limitation. At its best, each is only part of the answer. An answer that won't hold still long enough to get nailed down - before the next 'must have' appears.
The Internet is Maturing, and so are Search Engines
In recent years, the capabilities and sophistication of the search engines have exploded. Public use and expectations have grown to match it. The public's reliance on the Internet as a reliable source expands ever faster. Recent studies found the Web to be the most trusted source of information for making major purchase decisions, second only to spouses for finding referrals.
A Harris Int"

Chord chart

Chord chart: "
The $5. Chord Chart
that is a music education in a nutshell...

Did you know that I got my start in piano playing from a chord chart I ordered from an ad in Popular Mechanics?
Sounds unlikely, doesn't it?
But it's true.
I took piano lessons as a small child, but never would have really gotten into music if it were not for that $2. chord chart. The chords I learned from that little two-buck chart got me hooked. From then on I couldn't wait to learn the next chord, the next progression, the next riff, the next substitution.
That 2-buck chord chart got me started in a career in music that....well, enough about that.
The point is this:
YOU can learn a TON about music just from this chord chart!
Listen as I explain:
Did you know that it is quite possible to know exactly which chords will occur in any given key?
It's true.
Once you know the principle behind it, it becomes easy to predict which chords you are going to encounter in most any song.
Why is that?
Because in any given key, there are 3 'primary' chords: the chords built on the 1st, 4th, and 5th degrees of the scale. I all these 3 chords 'the fam', because they show up more often than any other chords in that key. Just like at your house you and your family probably show up oftener than, say, Tony Blair, Tiger Woods, or Governor Terminator.
There are also 3 'secondary' chords: the chords built on the 2nd, 3rd, and 6th degrees of the scale. I call these 'the cousins', because while they don't show up as often as 'the fam', they show up much more often than, say, Hillary Clinton, Bill Murray, or Sean Hannity.
Other chords can be used, of course, and sometimes are, but by mastering the 'big 6' you pr"
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Piano Chords & Chord Progressions!

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